January 2, 2007

Hot Blooded

Man it's good to be home!

Nothing beats coming home to southern California in January. We were in Utah for the past nine days enjoying the benefits of a "white" Christmas - all of which were forgotten the second the plane touched down on the California coast this morning and a sea of flip-flop clad, cosmetically engineered, bimbos welcomed us back to Paradise.

Despite the delightful weather in L.A. today, I couldn't rid myself of the Northern cold that had permeated my joints. The first thing I did was to open up the sliding doors in our bedroom and take a long nap to the sound of my hummingbirds whirring outside at their feeders. Afterwards, I opened our front door and knelt reverently in a hot puddle of sunshine with my eyes closed, purring like a fat cat. To complete my re-warming process I took an extended soak in the tub to get the most stubborn of the chill out of my toes. Ten hours later I feel almost human again.

I don't know how you extreme climatists do it. After only nine days I was a mental wreck. My in-laws started looking like jerky and I had the strange urge to go out and club baby seals. I get it. Snow is pretty. You know what else is pretty? Lava. Let's all go live on beautiful lava flow. Or if it's really all about looks, can you imagine anything more romantic than living on a nuclear fallout plain? All that dainty gray ash filtering through the sky and leaving a ethereal crown of fluff on your hair when you step outside? Charming. Oh, oh - here's a better idea. How about we all move to Arizona and build a gigantic urban center in the middle of the 130 degree desert and name it Phoe... oh wait - people really did that.

My fingers are all warmed up and I'm ready to start blogging again. How about some incensed replies from you extreme-climate people to keep my temperature up.

17 comments:

Janell said...

Lol. The answer is in thermal underware and lots of layers. I have as many as five or six layers on in the winter! It's the only way to survive UT.

It's posts like this one that keep brining me back to your site to read more =)

compulsive writer said...

You know it's really not so different. It's just that all of our genetically engineered bimbos are wearing UGG boots this time of year. (Oh, did I write that out loud?)

Bex said...

I am totally with you. I HATE the cold. The winter season turns me into a grouchy lady. AND I am PRETTY SICK of all this snow. If I could, I would move to Arizona and live in warmness all year round.

Rachelle Black said...

Simply cannot tolerate the heat anymore... I have gone from sun worshipper to ice goddess.
The older I get, the more the propensity to melt. Perhaps our thermal cores simply begin to malfunction??

I like having 4 seasons up here in the mountains, but I especially like the fact that it only gets 90 for a couple of weeks, and that I can count on cold days/nights and snow in the fall and winter.
Slainte~
Rachelle

Lianne said...

I want to come to LA... but not for Christmas. Christmas needs to be cold. But now it is January, and I'm ready for spring. Fat chance that's going to happen.

I want to be genetically engineered. Sounds fun.

Glo said...

I miss the seasons and the snow. Really. All the "warm" starts to get to me about now. I want rain and cold and even some white stuff. Though I am proud to say that I've joined the Cali ranks in complaining about the "cold" when it drops below 70.

stupidramblings said...

Maybe I'm missing something in the translation, but I don't think I understand how you really feel. Would you please clarify?

Kristine said...

I've always said I'd rather be cold than hot...because you can layer and make yourself warm. There is nothing to do when you are in Phoenix in the middle of the concrete jungle in 120 degree heat. We avoid our family in AZ from April to October because it's too hot for us now...and we lived there just 3 years ago!

drainey said...

Sarah, the reason people live in snow is because their husbands get jobs in snowy places. It can happen to anyone!

wierd al said...

A Californian complaining about snow?? Thank goodness this blog has links.

Sarah said...

Yeah, I was a little hesitant to put up the dreaded post about weather but my top blog post idea from yesterday got nixed and I was scraping for something. For some reason my husband just didn't want me blogging about my hairy legs. Next time I'll just slip it by him.

A friend of Sarah said...

You got it right Draino. We go where the jobs are, then sit and cope, and if we're smart, we learn to love wherever we are. But I will say, knowing little Sarah to the core, that she is NOT a cold weather girl. Not a cold weather girl. Not a cold wea...

Thank goodness for heaters?

amanda said...

this post was hilarious. you at your best. i did love the weather in so. cal. when we lived there, but i did forget what month it was on a regular basis. i just always figured it was april.

a covington said...

i hope all this sunshine is making your cold go away! i'm glad you guys are home!

Rachel said...

Snow is dumb. You are right.

Suzie Petunia said...

Amen, sister! You made me laugh. I'm glad you like your home. We got back from Utah last night and it RAINED and POURED all day long. Oh, joy. Snow v. Cold Rain... not a clear winner.

Ang said...

Wanna know what I missed most? My BED!! Jake's parents finally moved the full sized bed up from the spider infested basement and bought 650 thread count sheets so the Boise sleep was reasonable. My mom thought a futon would be the perfect way to utilize my bedroom--sofa by day, torture device by night. After about two nights of sleeplessness, Jake slept solo on the futon where he could spread out enough to toss and turn the night away. I claimed the couch. Much better sleep. Except when the wind was blowing so hard I thought the roof would take flight.