November 17, 2007

The Art of Deception: Toddler Style

I told my two year old that she needed to eat more of her dinner before she could play. A minute later I returned to the table and was proud to see most of the food gone. Pixie was dabbing her mouth with a napkin.

"Can I go play now?" Pixie sweetly asked.
"Sure, honey! I'm so proud of you for eating your dinner."
"Oh, I didn't eat it. I put it inside the vase and hid it behind the picture frame on the shelf so you wouldn't see it."
"Which picture frame?"
Pixie pointed to my engagement photo on the corner shelf.
"But don't look behind it, Mommy, because I don't want you to find the vase."

Sure enough, my Tiffany's bud vase was stashed behind the frame, crammed to the brim with beef stroganoff, broccoli and French bread.

It's a fascinating thing to see a person learn the art of deception. Obviously Pixie has a long way to go before she masters it, but she's well on her way. She'll approach me with her hands behind her back. "What are you holding behind your back," I ask.
"Your makeup. But I'm hiding it so you don't take it away from me."
"Can I have it?"
"No, I'm hiding it so you won't know I have it."

Or this scenario: I'm sitting at my desk working and she comes running up to me with a mouth stuffed full of chocolate. "Mommy! I didn't just get the candy out of your purse and eat it."
"Then what's that in your mouth?"
"Nuffing."
"Is it chocolate?"
"No! I didn't open your purse to get it out."

The poor thing, she does try. How ineffective to be cursed with both sneakiness and honesty simultaneously. The two just don't mix.

15 comments:

Anonymous said...

Ya gotta love that. My little brothers would do that to.

Susan M said...

That's hilarious.

When my kids were small, they'd come up to me and say, "Mom, don't come into my room for ten minutes." And I knew something was up.

Once we were all watching tv in the livingroom, and my youngest suddenly said, "Nobody smell anything!"

Colleen said...

Wow. That's one honest little criminal. I say enjoy it while it lasts!

Dan said...

Maybe she's just double bluffing you and really she's been out the back jacking cars.

holly said...

That's so funny. How nice to have a daughter who is so honest. At my house, I'm already punishing all the kids because I cannot figure out who is lying and who is telling the truth. Yikes!

her royal highness said...

Too funny! I remember the days when I knew who was lying and who wasn't. Now, like holly, they all have to be punished because I just can't tell anymore.

Kate said...

This is a wonderful story. Warms my heart.

Rachelle said...

Hollywood,
You haven't picked up any seriously sicko stalkers have you?
That anonymous blog entry was just freaky, I was afraid if I tried to leave a comment I might be sucked into the black hole and never be seen or heard from again...
Are you and yours all okay?
Worried in the mountains.
Rachelle

Sue said...

Oh, man, hilarious. That slayed me.

Hmmm.. Is slayed a word? I don't know.

Suzie Petunia said...

Don't worry. Under your careful tutelage she will eventually master the fine art of sneakiness. But if she needs a good tutor I can rent you my daughter. I'm pretty sure if she were tested by a professional she would be granted status as "Master of Sneakiness".

Rynell said...

The ineffective sneaky/honest combination is sooo great for moms.

Rachel said...

That is absolutely adorable. My 4 year old is a bit like that.
What a great story.
thanks for sharing!!

ummmhello said...

She too funny. And a Tiffany vase no less!!!
My little guy is 4 and he's just realized that if I ask him a question, he doesn't HAVE to tell the truth. That's when it gets really interesting :)

My Semblance of Sanity said...

JUST TOO FUNNY!!!!!!!!

Absolutely priceless!

Deb said...

Thank goodness, because I hate to think about discovering that vase two weeks from now.