January 28, 2008

My Baby the Ageist

Do old women terrify you too? Almost every time I go out with my 10 month old Cher, some good-intentioned old lady come hopping up, cackling and cooing in her face. Cher's expression inevitably curls up in terror and she screams bloody murder. To her, it's as if that ghosty librarian from the movie "Ghostbuster" has just lunged at her with murderous intent.

As the mother, it is then my job to try and explain to this sweet, wrinkled old lady why she scares the living daylights out of my child. Of course, the reasons are many but as a politically correct mother, I give an apologetic smile and lie. "She's really tired," or "she's teething." The truth would be more along the lines of, "maybe if you didn't talk like a crazy cat lady," or "do you blame her? You're terrifying looking!"

Yesterday at church an old abuelita came over to where we were sitting and began cackling out silly Spanish poems and poking her fingers in Cher's face. Screams ensued. "Eh?" creaked the old woman. "Maybe she never heard someone talk like me?" She tried again to charm Cher with a silly Spanish song but Cher went purple with rage and clawed at my shoulder, trying to escape.

Of all the people for my baby to be afraid of, why does it have to be the old ladies? She has no problem with the homeless guy at the park who is covered in bird poop and wants to tickle her toes. But old ladies? They're the stuff of nightmares.

10 comments:

Karen said...

Oh, no! That's kinda funny, but I can see how it would cause all kinds of problems. Poor Cher.

Her Royal Highness said...

Do you blame her? They ARE terrifying looking! sometimes they terrify ME!

Marie said...

My daughter was always like that too, but with everyone. I'd tell people she's shy, but that seemed to make them want to prove their mettle. Thankfully she's not shy anymore.

Suzie Petunia said...

This is why I want to die before I get old. If I am too old to go running and my aged face scares babies... what is the point?

S'mee said...

Not that I am getting close to my "sell by" date, but heck, I am getting nervous with all this "old lady" talk. lol

Few ox said...

That's great! I think she can sense something about these old ladies. They aren't always as nice as they look, i.e. the old lady from Hansel and Gretel.

Anonymous said...

My child cries when black people smile at her. I hope she grows out of this.

fairygrandmother said...

Wait till she starts talking. My son once told an old lady she had big teeth and she looked like the big bad wolf. Explain that to a complete stranger in the queue at the supermarket!

Th. said...

.

Just start screaming even louder and see what happens.

Shannon said...

My daughter told me when she was about 4 that old people look like they're melting and that's why she was scared of them.