February 23, 2008

The Very Talented Hollywood

I don't claim to be good at everything. I'm good at a lot of things. Making homemade Reese's Peanut Butter Cups, pulling off the bed-head look, memorizing camp songs, but admittedly, apartment management isn't my forte. Unfortunately, I'm an apartment manager. This morning I had the following cell phone conversation with one of my tenants:

"Hi, Abby. Sorry to call so early on a Saturday morning. We had a break in last night and we know at least one car was stolen. I'm calling because your parking space is empty. Is your car supposed to be here?"
"What? Are you kidding? Yes it's supposed to be there!"
"Abby, I think your car may have been stolen. I'm so sorry."
"I can't believe it. They stole my car!? Holy (insert small fluffy animal). You're sure it's gone?"
"Positive. I'm standing right here at parking spacer #24 and it's empty. Could you come down and help the police fill out a report?"
"Holy [puppies]. I'm coming right now. I just have to - wait... you said spot 24? That's not my spot. I park in 11."
"... ... ... My bad. Your car is here. I was looking at the wrong column on my spreadsheet. Ha ha. Twenty four is your storage locker number. Wow. Sorry to bother you. Really sorry. I hope you can fall back asleep. Again, I'm SO sorry."
Tenant is still gasping in shock when I snap my phone shut and smack my forehead.

But I make a darn fine peanut butter cup. Darn fine.

31 comments:

Perla said...

Hilarious! Thanks!

bythelbs said...

So who's car was supposed to be in #24?

I bet everyone at your building loves their quirky apt. manager. You're probably great material for at least a few dinner party stories!

Hollywood said...

Spot #24 belongs to the woman who we now believe unwittingly let the criminals into the garage when she left for work at 5:30 in the morning. There were no forced locks and the sounds of crashing glass and car alarms all occurred soon thereafter. She feels pretty bad.

Total damage: one stolen car, two cars with windows busted out and lots of junk stolen. Most importantly, a wedding ring. Ouch.

Colleen said...

Wow, I think you might owe Abby some of those peanut butter cups! Great story, sounds like the sort of thing I'd do if I were an apartment manager.

Julie said...

Can you post the Peanut Butter Cup recipe?

Have you already?

Please!!

Calidaho said...

Uhm, when you doubt your worth as an apartment manager, go read the one about all the stuff you have seen pulled out of the plumbing. That alone gives you at least 275 free passes for scaring the tulips out of your tenants!

April said...

How are you map reading Skillz? :oD

Hollywood said...

Funny you should ask, April. One of my (many) nicknames in high school was "Mapsco" because I'm a natural born navigator. I almost never get lost and once I've been somewhere once, I can find it again 10 years later. It's weird to say, but I've always loved maps and wherever I go or visit, I always make sure to have a map with me so I can get to know the city and never get lost from day one.

And I'm really good at bragging.

Julie - the peanut butter cup recipe is impossible to get wrong because all the ingredients are delicious. Here's how I make mine:

Melt chocolate chips in the microwave (30 second bursts, stirring in between).

Using muffin cups or those great silicone tiny muffin trays, pour a tiny amount of chocolate in the bottom and push around with your a spoon until it barely coats the bottom and a little bit up the sides of the cup. Put the cups in the fridge for about 15 minutes to harden.

In a bowl, mix together 1/2 cup of graham cracker crumbs, 1/2 cup of peanut butter and then add powdered sugar until the mixture isn't sticky. You'll know when you reach the right consistency because the mix will ball up and not stick to your fingers. Press a bit of the mixture into each of the cooled cups and flatten.

To finish, pour a bit of melted chocolate on top of each cup and spread around again so that the peanut butter layer is covered. Stick in the fridge for at least an hour until the peanut butter layer firms up.

SOOO good. This is Spike's favorite dessert on the earth. But the guy pretty much lives off only only peanut butter anyway so it was a no brainer for us. You guys should definitely try it!

Heather O. said...

Bwhahahahahahahahah!!!! So sorry to laugh at your expense, but... bwahahahahahahahahaha!!!

Summer said...

HAHAHAHAHAHA!!

1stdaughter said...

That sounds exactly like something I would do...and then would laugh about for years to come....hehe.

Nikki said...

mmm... peanut butter cups.

Burgh Baby's Mom said...

Poor Abby! I think you may owe her a few peanut butter cups.

The Wiz said...

Guess what our treat for FHE tomorrow will be? Oh man those PB cups look gooooood.

OK, and telling someone her car was stolen? That'll get her heart rate going. Whoops! It is totally funny though.

pflower10 said...

How did #24 let the criminals in??? Were they waiting to come in when she left? Did she see them? I bet she could use some peanut butter cups too.

The MomBabe said...

Bwah-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha! I'm sure Abby will get over it...eventually.

April said...

is your favorite song "maps" by the yeah yeah yeah's? :)

April said...

is your favorite song "maps" by the yeah yeah yeah's? :)

S'mee said...

Oh my heck! Just this week we went out for Stake visits and we went to a gated community. Dialed up the number and nothing. Nada. Zip. hmmm what to do? Then along comes another resident -leaving- and looks at us and waves us in. Um, Thanks!

So we drive in and another car behind us also drives in without codes. SO much for the gate! I mean I'm glad we got in, but we wondered if they did this all the time? Was out little old lady safe in there or is it an illusion?

and HAHAHAH great story, sorry, but yeah HAHAHAH!

Jessica G. said...

Mmmmmm...peanut butter....

And Sven has left me for my daughter. Apparently she has the arms of a natural swimmer but whatever. I think he just likes the tea parties.

Susan M said...

I'd much rather be told my car was stolen only to find out it wasn't true than actually have it stolen.

I can say this because I've had my car stolen.

Janell said...

Personally, I think the news that my car hasn't been stolen is fantastic news.

How was it that a wedding ring was stolen?

Few ox said...

I wish my car would be stolen so I can finally get a new one! Does anyone need my address?

Irishmama said...

Ooh, I was gonna ask for the recipe, now I don't need to ask, its already here. Thanks Hollywood. Keep me laughing.

abby said...

I agree with Colleen. All people named Abby deserve peanut butter cups.

Myka said...

Hollywood- help me out here. So I already made your peanut butter cups. I glanced over at my kitchen table at the half pound Hershey Kiss that my grandma gave me for V-day and thought it would be perfect melted as peanut butter cups! So we just dug into them, and how do you get them to come out in one piece? I just poured chocolate into a metal muffin pan and the bottom layer won't come out. Any ideas? Do I need to use the paper muffin cups that I refuse to buy, instead prying muffins out of the cups? I need some advice here!

They are tasty still!

Mark A said...

Homemade Peanut Butter Cups...?
Holy [puppies]! I'm coming right now.

Hollywood said...

Sorry, Myka! I think I didn't give the instructions clearly enough. You DEFINITELY need to use paper muffin cups if you are using a metal muffin tin. With the silicone muffin trays, you can just twist the dessert out but in a metal tray, the chocolate is sure to stick. Paper cups are mandatory for full enjoyment of the treat.

The Wiz said...

I made the PB cups last night and am currently eating them for breakfast. Tasty.

I do have questions for you as well, though.

How many does this recipe make for you? I got 20 out of it. And do you do an entire bag of chocolate chips? That's what I did, melted 1/2 of it for the first part, and 1/2 for the second. I did have a bit of PB left over, though.

Does that sound about right to you?

Also, my family thanks you. They are pretty darn good.

Hollywood said...

Sorry Wiz, I don't really have a recipe for the stuff. Sometimes we just make it in an 8x8 pan and have big bar type treats with it (line the pan with parchment paper or wax paper beforehand). The great thing about the recipe is that it will taste good in almost any format or size. I'm glad your family liked it!

Amber said...

Well- she won't need her cardio work out this morning will she? Yikes on having to be the one to spread the bad news! Mmmm... peanut butter cups...