They'll Make Anyone a Parent these Days!

There is a rumor circulating that being a parent makes you mature and wise. Baloney.

Pixie had been in bed for over an hour and Spike and I were watching some tv. We sometimes like to look at her asleep so I suggested we go in and peek at her. Spike instantly came up with a far better idea. "Why don't we go drip water on her face and see what she does!" I looked at him like he was a monster but a split second later realized I was a monster too and cheerfully replied "Okay!" We tiptoed gleefully into her dark room with our water bottle. We were only a few feet from crib in the dark room before we noticed she was sitting up and grinning at us. I guess her spidey sense warned her of our capricious intent. Disappointed, we left the room only to return an hour later with hopes of a second attempt at our little prank. She was still wide awake - daring us to try with a silly little smile. I went in once more time that night, close to midnight to see if she had finally fallen asleep only to find her still watching the door like a hawk. She's nobody's fool.

Just last week Spike and I were trying to get out the door but Pixie needed a diaper change so Spike graciously volunteered for a quick diaper duty. He disappeared with Pixie in the back room and 30 seconds later he yelled, "Honey, do we have any silver tape?"
"Silver tape?" I yelled back, not sure what he was talking about.
"Yeah, like Duct Tape!" he replied.
I had no clue what he could possibly need Duct Tape for and went to the back room to see what had happened. It turns out that with all his manly vigor, he had ripped the Velcro tabs off the fresh diaper but reasoned that the diaper itself was still in fine condition and could simply be Duct Taped around her little hips. There was an awkward pause while I tried to think of why this wouldn't be a good idea. "Forget it," said Spike, "I'll just stick a new one on her." In hindsight, this was a much better option than strapping her in with electrical tape - but for a moment there, we really weren't sure that duct tape wasn't a perfectly acceptable solution.

We're winging this whole parent thing. It's all fun and games until we get our kid taken away by the state!

Comments

Gina said…
Nephi really does duct tape the tabs back on the diapers. It works :)
Unknown said…
I've taped the tabs back on the diaper, too.
Personally, I don't see anything wrong with taping the diaper. It's when you start taping the kids that things start getting controversial.
Anonymous said…
what would inspire you to sprinkle water on your childs face while she is sleeping... and what would be the point?
Spike said…
the point would be to see the funny face and/or the reaction of the child at having water sprinkled on her face. it would be funny.
Unknown said…
I'm all for sprinkling water on a baby's face. My parents that it was hilarious to watch us burn our fingers on our first birthday with the candle on the cake. It was actually probably a good thing. The Oehring clan boys really enjoy fire, and burning our finger at age one perhaps taught us that fire can be dangerous.
Spike said…
i am not quite so sure i would think of burning of fingers as funny. necessary, perhaps, but maybe not funny. but sprinkling of water on sleeping baby's face, now that's just funny. and harmless.
Lady Steed said…
I have used packing tape to close many diapers. One of the boxes of diapers we got, it seemed like on every fifth diaper one of the tabs would rip off. It was infuriating. Fortunately we had lots of packing tape.
Sarah said…
Wow! So I guess duct tape is a tried and true diaper salvage technique! Thanks everyone for passing on your war stories :)

As far as the anonymous comment asking why sprinkle a sleeping baby with water, if you have to ask, you will never know.
Jules said…
:) I don't know if we are just super skilled diapering parents or just completely out of the loop, but we have never had to consider using tape on diapers :) Maybe we need to work out more because our strength doesn't seem to rip the tabs off! LOL

hmmmm and although they are anon I have to say that I am kind of with them on the water "controversy". Seems a little "middle school sleepover-ish" :) but I have my own "quirks" in which I will never mature so carry on!

(p.s. I am Jareds sis in law- just trying to help you reach fame and fortune, and waste the possibility of a productive afternoon)
Anonymous said…
I heard a reassuring quote on good parenting the other day that gave me hope for my own future as a parent, it said- "to be a good parent you just have to not kill the kid." -tori
drainey said…
If I rip the tab off a clean diaper I put the ripped diaper on, then put another diaper over it to hold it in place. Then next time I change the diaper, I already have one there, ready to go, an nothing gets wasted.

And for those couple of hours when they are wearing both diapers, my kid's bum is totally spank-proof, a good thing these days.

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