Daisy Sour Cream Inspirations
Dear Daisy,
Last week I opened up a container of your Sour Cream and found a freshness seal blocking the way between me and an afternoon calorie fest. The seal had a picture of a delicate white tulip and the words, "If life gives you limes, just rearrange the letters and return a smile."
Wha? Can you even do that? And why was my sour cream giving me life advice? Rather than try and tackle these unexpected questions, I went ahead and tore off the seal and dished an unhealthy amount of saturated fat into my chicken soup.
I kept the flavor seal next to my sink hoping that the deeper meaning of a seemingly ridiculous tip would manifest itself. Two days later, nothing. On your website today I found an entire collection of "'Fresh Thinking' foil seals, featuring uplifting, positive thoughts from Daisy." Each line was more frustratingly useless than the next. I understand the intention, but the execution stinks.
It reminds me of a Japanese singer, trying to sing in English. She strings together a bunch of peppy words and hopes they make sense together. Something like, "happy puppies sleep peacefully under the ice cream bush in hope." True, I feel oddly uplifted after reading it, but really can't explain why.
Your website invites visitors to submit their own "Fresh Thinking" ideas to perhaps appear on one of your freshness seals. Here are some of mine. Take care, my definition of "fresh" may not be the same as yours:
"When life hands you flaming bags of poop, make s'mores"
"If you feel bad, pretend you feel good so people don't get uncomfortable."
"Yes, you are fat. Put away the sour cream and eat some celery."
"It is better to give than to receive - unless you have a communicable, fatal disease."
Just a few of my humble suggestions. This Fresh Thinking is brought to you by Hollywood Flakes. We are in no way affiliated with Daisy, have no psychiatric or counseling training, and are notorious for not following our own advice.
Sincerely,
Hollywood
Readers, if you want to submit any of your fresh ideas to Daisy, email them to shareideas@daisybrand.com or leave them in the comments section. I'm sure we can come up with something better for me to read on my sour cream then they have! And in case you couldn't tell, I'm feeling a little morose today - sorry for the snarkiness!
Last week I opened up a container of your Sour Cream and found a freshness seal blocking the way between me and an afternoon calorie fest. The seal had a picture of a delicate white tulip and the words, "If life gives you limes, just rearrange the letters and return a smile."
Wha? Can you even do that? And why was my sour cream giving me life advice? Rather than try and tackle these unexpected questions, I went ahead and tore off the seal and dished an unhealthy amount of saturated fat into my chicken soup.I kept the flavor seal next to my sink hoping that the deeper meaning of a seemingly ridiculous tip would manifest itself. Two days later, nothing. On your website today I found an entire collection of "'Fresh Thinking' foil seals, featuring uplifting, positive thoughts from Daisy." Each line was more frustratingly useless than the next. I understand the intention, but the execution stinks.
It reminds me of a Japanese singer, trying to sing in English. She strings together a bunch of peppy words and hopes they make sense together. Something like, "happy puppies sleep peacefully under the ice cream bush in hope." True, I feel oddly uplifted after reading it, but really can't explain why.
Your website invites visitors to submit their own "Fresh Thinking" ideas to perhaps appear on one of your freshness seals. Here are some of mine. Take care, my definition of "fresh" may not be the same as yours:
"When life hands you flaming bags of poop, make s'mores"
"If you feel bad, pretend you feel good so people don't get uncomfortable."
"Yes, you are fat. Put away the sour cream and eat some celery."
"It is better to give than to receive - unless you have a communicable, fatal disease."
Just a few of my humble suggestions. This Fresh Thinking is brought to you by Hollywood Flakes. We are in no way affiliated with Daisy, have no psychiatric or counseling training, and are notorious for not following our own advice.
Sincerely,
Hollywood
Readers, if you want to submit any of your fresh ideas to Daisy, email them to shareideas@daisybrand.com or leave them in the comments section. I'm sure we can come up with something better for me to read on my sour cream then they have! And in case you couldn't tell, I'm feeling a little morose today - sorry for the snarkiness!
Comments
Do you think they'll like it?
(I love the word snarky, incidentally.)
I'm glad Makes and Takes got something out of it though. I wish I could.
I would add to yours:
When life hands you flaming bags of poop, make s'mores... and give them to someone you don't like.
Some others for your list:
When you get overwhelmed with life, just remember that you're going to die someday.
You know what would go great with that outfit you're wearing? A personality.
Money can't buy happiness, but it comes closer than dog poop.
'When you're smoochin' with your hunny, and your nose gets kinda runny, he may think it's pretty funny, but it's snot!'
Try to stay dry in 'sunny California'...from The OC.
Vivian, Yorba Linda, CA
"Congratulations! You've just won a million dollars!"
Now THAT would brighten my day!
Just WHY????