February 20, 2008

Anonymous Comment Day: Your Biggest Mistake

My dumb writing group decided the prompt for this month would be "Mistakes." Consequently, I've spent all month trying to think about what to write about and dredging up all the memories of my biggest mistakes. It hasn't made for a good month. So I'm passing the bad energy on to you because I'm nice like that. Maybe your comments will help me come up with something creative for my writing group.

So the question is, what is the the biggest or worst mistake you've ever made? I'm a little afraid to see what's going to happen with this question but hope it will make for some killer comments. As always, only anonymous comments allowed and I'll anonymize (yes, when you are as cool as me you can make up words) any comments that aren't.

71 comments:

Anonymous said...

I fell in love with the wrong man, and convinced myself for 5 years he was the right one. When we finally called it off, I coped with an eating disorder, and almost missed out on the true love of my life.

But everything worked out, 10 years and three kids later, I can look back and be thankful things didn't work out.

Anonymous said...

hmm...guess I'm perfect.

Anonymous said...

I was a teenager working in a sporting goods store. My first week I accidentally allowed someone to walk away (steal) a brand new pair of Air Jordan tennis shoes (which were THE thing to have at the time). Needless to say I wanted to melt into the floor, slither away and never show my face again. Although I somehow managed to get a gut and tell my boss, who gave me a nice lecture on not being so naiive.

Anonymous said...

I slept through my 6 am alarm clock one morning and missed my boss pounding on my door to pick me up for a business trip to the city. That was humiliating. The worst part of all: I had been up at 5 feeding the baby but went back to sleep afterward.

Anonymous said...

At my best friend's wedding reception, I "spanked" her dad because I thought it was my husband walking past. Most embarassing moment ever (maybe for both me and her dad??

Anonymous said...

Jan 1, 1995-March 1996.

I shudder at the thought I've ever been mixed up with it! But the summer of 1996 made up for it!

Anonymous said...

Oh come on! What happened from Jan 1, 1995-March 1996? You're anonymous, go wild!

Anonymous said...

The biggest mistake I ever made was going off an anti-depressant cold turkey. It doesn't affect everyone the same way but I'm lucky to be alive today.

Anonymous said...

I thought dating someone 11 years older than me was a good idea. Oh, and that his "suggestions" all the time weren't controlling. HA!

Anonymous said...

Oh, and I also decided to drink 3 margaritas at LAX on an empty stomach before boarding a plane. The consequences were not pretty.

Anonymous said...

Most embarrassing flub ever in the October following 9/11. What I meant to say was, "A result of the recent attack an increased demand for professionals in [computer] security." What I said was, "The attack caused a lot of job positions to open."

Great. I'm the heartless person who is excited because somebody's death opened up a job.

Needless to say, they never called.

Anonymous said...

Getting married so young.

Anonymous said...

Ok, after reading all your worst mistakes I can't even THINK about posting mine, even anonymously. Hasn't anyone ever REALLY screwed up?

Anonymous said...

I got engaged 4 weeks before my 'intended' missionary came home. I emailed him (the missionary) about my engagement the night he got home, and then never saw or heard from him. I don't blame him, and I don't regret my marriage to my husband, but sometimes I wish that I'd waited and gone on a few dates with my returned missionary, enjoyed maybe 1 or 2 more incredible kisses (he was an awesome kisser) and then told him I was in love with someone else. Selfish, I know. But even worse is no closure and never having seen him post-mission or saying good-bye face to face.

Anonymous said...

I've got a couple of doozies, but the first that comes to mind is pretty awful. In ninth grade a friend told me she'd slept with her stepbrother. I told several people before finding out years later that she had been eleven, he sixteen. It was obviously sexual abuse and I couldn't take back what my big mouth had spread around.

Anonymous said...

When my son was 6 months old I told myself he was getting taller. Really he was loosing weight. He lost 2 pounds between 4 and 6 months old. I shouldn't have been so lazy when my Mother in Law kept asking about it and just gotten it checked out. As a result my sweet little baby was subjected to MRI's, Xrays, and all sorts of needles. Come to find out... my milk had dried up because I wasn't drinking enough water (another mistake). I will ALWAYS listen to my instinct now aka the Spirit. Even now I can't look at picture of him when he was between 4-6 months old because of the guilt I feel whenever I do. I wonder sometimes if because of me he has a tendancy to over eat ingrained in him because I practically starved him for about a month. He is now 4 years old.

NG said...

Wow... such serious answers! I was going to say painting the living room green.

Anonymous said...

I dated a rather abusive/controlling boyfriend, and justified it to my parents as "he cares".
And becuase of that I missed out on a lot of fun experiences my senior year, not only with my school friends but with my family also.

Anonymous said...

Being put on the spot, I'm going with the time I dyed my hair and it ended up bluish-green instead. I had to live like that for nearly a year before all traces were gone.

Anonymous said...

The first thing that comes to mind is not being vigilant about giving my daughter her asthma control meds, which was most likely a major contributing factor to a life-threatening attack.

Also, I wish I had made better use of my time with my husband before the kids arrived--while we were still young.

Anonymous said...

Hands down. Not finishing college and getting my degree.

Anonymous said...

Fooling around with boys in high school

Anonymous said...

At 16 I was given the keys and alarm code to the little boutique/store I worked at, and was told to close up. I did this MANY nights with no problem. One night, in a hurry to get home to go out with some friends, I locked one door, set the alarm, went out the other door and left,forgetting to lock the second door behind me. About an hour later I got a call from my boss, and the police saying a break in had been reported at the store. Apparently a lady had opened the door and THANKFULLY being honest called to report to the police that the store was closed, but the doors weren't locked.

Anonymous said...

No question. Married the w.r.o.n.g person. Caused me a lifetime of regret.

Anonymous said...

I totally wasted my college experience by picking a major that was quick and easy rather than what my passion was. Every day since graduation I've wished I could turn back the clock and study what I was really interested in so that I could pursue that in life.

Anonymous said...

Why do they let 18-year-olds decide what they want to do with the rest of their lives? I realized about 3/4 through my major that I should have picked something else...the major that I really, truly loved from the beginning and not the one I was currently wrapping up that would have given me a decent job. Turns out I could have found a perfectly good job doing what I truly loved. And now, if I ever want to be qualified to do that job, I'll need to go back to school.

Anonymous said...

Geez! I'm a model citizen!

I used to have bad credit.

Anonymous said...

Buying an investment house at the wrong time aka just before the market tanked. Not only lost loads of money, but more importantly, so many opportunities. It has totally changed the course of our lives. Biggest mistake ever - we'll be paying the consequences for years.

Anonymous said...

Biggest Mistake, eh? Wow.

Getting pregnant when I was 19 by my boyfriend, who told me we would leave the state if I had "it", then beleiving the abortion nurse when she told me "it" wasn't a baby but just tissue.

I cried and cried when they laid me on the table, and they just kept telling me it would be over soon, and everything would be normal again.

Fifteen years later and I'm still waiting...

Anonymous said...

Sharing intimate things with other people before i met my husband. I wish I never built those bonds with somebody other than him. Big mistake.

Anonymous said...

being talked into refinancing my house on a variable, interest only loan

Anonymous said...

Waited for a missionary. Seriously, what was I thinking??

Anonymous said...

I fell in love with a man that was emotionally abusive. I remained with him for over three years, even though he cheated on me repeatedly. I became a person I cannot believe I allowed myself to become. I let him cheat on me... and then after I'd called it quits I went back to him and let him cheat on his girlfriend and then fiance with me... simply because I was too afraid to be alone.

Anonymous said...

hands down... sleeping with my husband before we were married... confessing to the bishop, and then sleeping with him again before the temple... but getting married in the temple anyway.

no, i take that back... because i'd still have married him, just not in the temple...

it'd be the 8 men i slept with before i met my husband. i am my biggest mistake.

Anonymous said...

Quitting piano lessons.

S'mee said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

obviously posting a confession without first making sure i was "annonymous" before clicking "send" ---duh!

Anonymous said...

One day back when I worked at a daycare, I was getting all the kiddos to go to the potty after naptime... I had 2 year olds in and out of the bathroom... Apparently while I was doing this, one of the little boys left with his mom... I didn't realize until 10 minutes later when I saw his mat was still out and not put away. The rest of the day I was really hoping no one would show up to pick him up... because that would mean he ran off or was kidnapped... No one else came so then I went home that night hoping he'd be at daycare the next day... Thankfully he was... because of this I'm now a "counting Nazi" because I'm constantly counting heads of the kids I'm watching over in whatever situation!

Anonymous said...

That is so freaky about the missing kid at pre-school! If someone had shown up you'd have been SO busted! I can't imagine a more nerve wracking situation.

Anonymous said...

Having sex (my first time) with a much older married man. I knew it was wrong, I hated myself then and I still get sick to my stomach when I think about it. How stupid could I be?!!! I moved out of state right after it happened but I blame/d everything that hasn't gone right in my life on that decision...not getting married (finally did at 40) and not being able to have children (tried AI for years as a single woman). I see it as just punishment.

Anonymous said...

my biggest mistake also has to do with a college degree. i got the easy one ie, useless. i hate that we are still paying student loans for a college degree that couldn't support my family if i needed it to.

Anonymous said...

To anon who slept with her husband and got married in the temple anyway.....This sounds like someone I knew way back when! I secretly wonder if its you....

Anonymous said...

Marrying my first husband instead of breaking up with him. I thought marrying him would make things better. I was wrong.

Anonymous said...

Leaving college with one course left. I am still working on it 4 years later. Wish I had stayed and finished it there. I have been have nightmares about it.

Actually I want to redo college, have my major picked out and not fail any classes.

Anonymous said...

My biggest mistake was thinking that marriage and family were the "ultimate trap" when I was younger and I avoided it like the plague to focus on my career.

Anonymous said...

asking a college friend to be a bridesmaid in my wedding, when I knew she didn't approve of my fiance. We don't correspond anymore.

Anonymous said...

My biggest mistake ever!!! Is that I let GUILT cloud the memories of the life experiences that are teaching me who I am.

God gives us repentance so we can live our lives learning from the experiences which we, in our self-judgmental, guilt ridden

Regret is a tool for realizing that our actions and choices, in any given experience, may not have represented who we are.

All these experiences we call life, are teaching us what we are or what we are not. If we waste our lives feeling guilty over the experiences that taught us what we are not, then we miss out on fully living the experiences that teach us who we are.

Love yourself enough to stop doing what you are not and start being who you are. Go find that lost love and get your closure; or accept that you will always love that individual and that love adds to, not detracts from, your current relationship.

Quit that meaningless job that doesn't provide for you and makes you miserable and go do what you love. College and degrees are meaningless, experience and love qualify you to be what you are passionate about, go be it.

Let go of the pain, it is not you. You are a creation of God, he is not punishing any of us, he is a loving forgiving father, His only pain is how cruelly we punish ourselves.

Why do we let the past destroy the present and predict our future?

Every religion offers as it's highest reward a paradise in the presence of God free from pain, worry, guilt, and regret. Ironic that all of those feelings are experienced in the present but come from the past or are from our prediction's of the future based on the past.

Each moment fully experienced is paradise!

I love me, I am my greatest success.

Guilt Sucks, and never the right things.

Anonymous said...

Paragraph two should read,

God gives us repentance so we can live our lives learning from the experiences which we, in our self-judgmental, guilt ridden pain, call mistakes.

Anonymous said...

I deleted my dad's emails thinking I was keeping my inbox tidy. After he died suddenly I wished I could go back and read the conversations we were having. I even asked hotmail if they could retrieve them but they couldn't--or wouldn't. At least I have all the letters he sent me while I was on my mission.

Anonymous said...

My first ever opportunity to supervise a staff was a mistake. I was in college working part time for the university recruitment office and overseeing phone bankers who called potential students. I hired three people--two of them friends. I made the mistake of starting off too casual and it snowballed into a lazy mess.

After graduation there have been positions in that department that I would be perfect for but the woman who was my boss is still there and will never hire me again!

Anonymous said...

About half way through my mission I was senior companion and let my companion listen to the radio. Giving just an inch turned into bigger abuses and she ended up starting a relationship with and getting engaged to one of the Elders while they were both still out there (after I left, but I still felt partially responsible). After they got home the Elder came to his senses, thank goodness. She ended up marrying a stake missionarey we worked with. I guess you could say she had a single purpose for being on a mission and it wasn't to teach the gospel!

Anonymous said...

Wasting a year and a half with a controlling and psychologically abusive 14-year-old friend. She was always doing horrible things to me, and I wasted SO much energy, and money, and even got bad grades because of her. Then I let her convince me I must really be a lesbian.

That lasted until a girl asked me out on a date and I realized that it was crazy. So I found a boyfriend (at 14) and got rid of her like the plague. But it was hard. And sad.

But I'll always wonder if marrying the man I did so soon was a mistake. Well, now, that's not true. I know it was what God wanted me to do. I just wish he was more like the man I almost married in some ways.

Anonymous said...

Letting my Masters thesis sit for five years. I kept meaning to do it but it got harder and harder to get back into. I could be working in my dream job right now if I had just done it!

Anonymous said...

Not taking care of my teeth. I ended up with a root canal about 7 years ago...didn't get the permanent crown and ended up having to have the thing pulled and a post put in. It would have been so much cheaper and less painful had I just gotten my cavities filled!!!

Anonymous said...

Not getting Hep A vaccines before going to a foreign country. Big BIG mistake. BIG.

Anonymous said...

I made a bad judgement call while working in a medical field. That call got somebody sent to the ER, and subsequently the ICU.

Most of the mistakes I have made that have hurt other people have come as a direct result of my negligence, my sloppiness. It is something that haunts me as a mother.

Anonymous said...

constantly making sure that I was never in family pictures because of the way I looked. The kids are in elementary school now and I really regret that for the five 5 or 6 years of their life it looks like they have friends of one fun parent at the zoo, park, Christmas Day, birthdays etc. I also made sure I was behind the camera.

Anonymous said...

That's a tough one. I've made a lot of doozies it seems.

I think the most life-changing one has everything to do with the number of partners I had before I met/married my husband. It should be zero - it isn't.

The "funniest" one lies in that I asked my 10th grade geometry teacher when the baby was due. yeah, uh, NEVER! She hated me from that moment on.

Anonymous said...

I should have slept around more before I settled down. Seriously. I know that probably shocks and appalls a blog who's readership is mostly Mormon, but I should have. I spent way too much of my young life "saving myself," like my virginity was my only thing of value to contribute to the world. I should have had a lot more (safe) fun.

Love my husband, have a great relationship, but I had so many opportunities I wasted when I was young.

Anonymous said...

I AM IN THE CRAIGSLIST KILLER BIATCHES!!!

But hey, at least I regret it!

(federal prosecutors: this is a joke, see previous post)

Anonymous said...

Should say, "I am the Craigslist Killer!" Not "I am in . . ." that makes no sense.

Hollywood said...

Wow. That comment made two and a half grueling years of blogging worth it! Thanks, killer.

Anonymous said...

stirrup pants

Anonymous said...

I married the first man who asked me out of fear no one else ever would.

It worked out, but I still feel like I chose a hard road with a man who had a lot of issues. I constantly wonder if I'm really in love with my husband.

Our life is so mundane, and that disappoints me.

Anonymous said...

I did sleep around. It didn't make me happy or bring anything but being scared sick getting an HIV test.

But, at least I know I really love my husband.

Anonymous said...

my biggest mistake huh? it would definitely have to have been that one time. Or maybe it was that other one? No, it was definitely that one.

Rick said...

Getting up this morning?

http://organizeddoodles.blogspot.com/

Anonymous said...

Leasing a new car when I should have bought used one.

luckyzmom said...

Buying the double reclining Lane sofa that is as comfortable and precarious as sitting on one of those cheap aluminum tube lawn chairs on a soggy lawn right after your 400 lb cousin got out of it.

Anonymous said...

getting married to the wrong man...
letting him abuse me...
staying married to him...
and then getting drunk and cheating on him...

who is the sick person now...

Anonymous said...

When I was fifteen years old I had a boyfriend that my parents “forbid” me to see. He had dropped out of school and it was my “freshman sneak” day. Not really much of a sneak day since you had to get permission slips to be excused from school and to go on the outing to the water pack, but I digress. I was the typical shy, goody toe shoes girl that had never even skipped a class so he completely planned out the day telling me to not turn in the permission slip so the school wouldn’t call my parents when I wasn’t on the bus for the fieldtrip and yadda, yadda, yadda. When the bus dropped me off at school that day I went and got in his car instead of going inside. I was fairly strong spiritually back then, but I never felt like the Spirit really told me what to do until that day. I had the darkest feeling come over me telling me to get out of the car and go into school. I told my boyfriend that but he got verbally angry and abusive with me so I went with him anyway. He ended up raping me that day and yet I stayed with him because I felt like I was “used goods” at that point. We continued to have sex because that was all he wanted from me after that and I ended up getting pregnant at fifteen years old. He left me after I wouldn’t get an abortion, but tried to get back together after I placed the baby for adoption.(I didn’t by the way which was one of few sane decisions in my young life.) I have been screwed up ever since then when it comes to sex and I had over 30 partners in college. I have since settled down and gotten back into the church and am married to a great husband, but I should have listened to the Spirit that day as it was practically screaming to me to get out of that car and I didn’t…that was definitely the worst mistake of my life!